GMA is driving me fucking insane. Her retention is low, yet she BELIEVES she’s completely competent. She is wondering why Im taking charge of the money, why I take the credit card etc, like Im robbing her. Im very close to the end of my rope. I could go on and on but I don’t feel like it because I’ll be back in the breach again in the morning.
Next, Phillip has gotten Covid. He had a friend over last weekend and he turned out to have it. So Phillip is banished to the basement. Miles has had to postpone his trip to New Orleans, so he can be sure he’s ok to go. Sam and I just got tested and we’re negative. As of now. I also got my first mammogram since the diagnosis and that came back clear. So, some good news.
It’s been a while and I have a minute, so here’s the update. We had a really great Christmas. It was quiet. We were supposed to go to our good friends for a small Christmas Eve night but we all just decided it was too much. We were sad but I think it was the right decision. We stayed home and the four of us hung out, played games and I made Baccala. I’ve always wanted to try it. It’s a traditional Italian dish, starting with dried cod, made especially at the holidays. I soaked it 3 days and made a really good recipe but we all agreed it would probably have been better with fresh fish, rather than the dried version. But at least we gave it a shot.
Christmas Day was super nice. We made our family’s traditional timpano. The boys helped and we had fun. We missed Gma, but honestly, it was relaxing and I was happy I didn’t have to worry about her.
The week after we all relaxed and the boys ended up going to see friends (Phillip to MA and Miles to NJ to see Meg) We hung with another couple and had a great time saying Bye Bye to 2020. Its been a tough year and unfortunately 2021’s start hasn’t been stellar. Im hoping this year brings health and more time spent with friends, which are the two most important things.
Yesterday I picked up Gma from rehab. What a day. I was extremely anxious. I got her home and it could have been worse. She’s still highly confused. I stayed the night and will for the next few days. I needed to see where exactly she was with her mobility etc. She’s still weak, but she did well getting around the apartment. The night was tough. She got up 4 times but she was ok to get to the bathroom on her own. I, on the other hand, was up EVERY HOUR because she has some stupid clock (Which I BOUGHT FOR HER), which first plays a song then bongs the amount of strikes for the hour, EVERY HOUR. So I’m zombie-like right now. Then, this am, she starts in on where is her stimulus check? How she got this bee in her bonnet is a mystery, but she asked about it approximately 6 times today. Thank God her helper came today at 2:30. Im free until 7 for the night shift. Hopefully this schedule will work for the short term. I think she’ll be ok at night once she settles in. Fingers crossed. Ugh.
Yesterday I’m on my exercise bike, watching Love Island. All of a sudden I hear Miles, who works in the room above me, yell “Holy Shit!”. Im thinking “What now?” I decide to continue on my bike until someone actually yells for me, a talent which has been honed by years of running to a problem, which most of the time doesn’t require the run. So I continue the cycle until Sam comes in looking for a “net”. Apparently a BIRD got into the house and was flying around upstairs in Miles’ room. Don’t ask me how, everyone thinks I let it in when I unloaded groceries, but I’m unconvinced.
So Sammy “McGuyvers” a net from a sleeping bag carrier and some walking stick. He then goes up there and I hear a lot of swearing and shuffling and finally they came down victorious, with the bird, which they released, much to the joy of the bird. Everyday, it’s something. I wish I could have seen the chase but I figured the less people up there the better.
Meanwhile, I spoke to GMA and she’s doing ok. She wants to come home, obviously, but she’s still not strong enough. It’s really hard because I cant go over there and see her. She’s doing physical therapy and I think they’re waiting to see if she can move around on her own because they’re scared of her falling, which is a concern of all of ours. We have a meeting Friday with the social workers and nurses and hopefully will have a positive update. Meanwhile, as predicted, she told me how I haven’t called her at all. Even though I try to get through everyday and the nurses don’t pick up and neither does she. The good news is, if she’s torturing me, she’s getting better.
Today is Phillip Georges birthday. It’s hard to believe he’s 24. Part of me feels like it was yesterday and another part feels like it was ages ago. I know he’s going to be cranky tonight because he wanted to go down to Arther Ave, but restaurants are closed for indoor dining in NY right now and, in addition, we getting hit by a big Nor’Easter, predicted to dump anywhere between 8-18 inches of snow tonight and into tomorrow. Im going to make Bolognese and we can celebrate at home. I know it’s tough but with any luck, next year he can have a big celebration when Covid is under control, fingers crossed.
A lot has been happening. We had a nice, yet very quiet Thanksgiving. Just us, the boys and Gma. All the food was great and we relaxed. Gma didn’t eat much but thats normal for her lately. Well, the following days came and went and Gma said she wasn’t feeling well. By Thursday she wasn’t any better and was clearly weak. I made the executive decision, against her will, to call an ambulance and send her to the hospital. Thank god I did.
Turns out she had a giant UTI and was dehydrated. They decided to admit her and they gave her a Covid test (which unless they admit they don’t do) and – she’s positive. She was miserable but still managed to complain about the food. Then her next move was to call at 8pm to ask for a delivery of her slippers, nightgown and robe. I said “Ok, I’ll bring them tomorrow.” Meanwhile she had a crazy roommate yelling in the background “Why cant she bring it tonight?”
We, meanwhile, ran around like lunatics trying to getting tested. All of us, thankfully, are negative. Yesterday, they decided there was nothing else the hospital could do for her as her lungs are clear and she needs no Covid treatment at this time, which is good. They’ve transferred her to a rehab place to try and get her strength up. Coincidentally, its the same place George, her 2nd husband, was in for 8 yrs when they first moved here. So I’m happy she’ll be in a familiar environment. Im waiting to talk to Dr. there after she’s evaluated. I spoke to nurse, who seems lovely and fingers crossed they can get her to eat and gain her strength back.
On the up side, In the last 2 days I’ve seen my orthopedist about hand (good), oncologist (good) and cardiologist (also good). Somehow, I’m ok. We got the tree and its up, as are the decorations. At least we can enjoy them while all this is happening. Below is our newest which I adore:
Didn’t break my hand!!! Woop Woop! My personal radiologist (LOL), my friend Maurys hubby Jeet, checked out my MRI and the bone is bruised but not broken, Thank God! So I still can’t use my hand for much, but no surgery and I just have to wait for it to heal. Im so happy I can’t tell you.
The house is still disaster, but the end is in sight. I think the painters will be done today. By next week everything will be put back together and we’ll feel normal again. Dining room is just about done and looks awesome and bedroom is on its way. Next week I’ll post pics when everything is in place.
Meanwhile, Phillip has us watching a YouTube guy who posts videos under Bald & Bankrupt. This English guy travels around all these obscure places, especially in former Soviet countries. He goes on amazing adventures and meets all these interesting people. I said to Sam, when we can travel again, I think we should do similar. Because we would be hilarious. At least we think we’re hilarious.
We love going to new places, love exploring and I cant wait to see new and different things. The only teeny tiny problem is that I speak no other languages. Sam, of course, is unbelievable at learning all different languages like Spanish, German, French etc. The bald guy from the show is fluent in Russian therefore can communicate with many people in the places he travels to. My mode of operation is usually to smile, point, nod my head like an idiot and usually I get what I want. Ive tried to learn, but my problem is I can understand most of what’s going on, but by the time I can figure out what to say, the conversation has moved on 3 other topics so I just give up and start nodding again…
Whatever. It’s a nice thing to think about, especially when Covid seems to be spiking again. Im so happy we decided to update the house a bit so this upcoming winter will be cozy. Miles has news that the move to Chicago will be postponed again so we’ll all be together for who knows how long, not that I’m complaining. Love having us together and love knowing we’re all ok. So until we CAN travel, I’ll just dream about all the places in the world we’ll be able to explore in the future, as long as I don’t kill myself in the meantime.
PS: Another small win. After the MRI Friday, I went to Home Depot and found Bounty paper towels! I realize, not such a big deal, except the only paper towels that are in our normal food store disintegrate the moment you get them off the roll. We affectionately call them prison paper towels. They suck. So finding Bounty was a little gift. I’ll take it…
You guys just aren’t going to believe this. Last week my friend and I went for a walk. Innocent as you please, walking along, my ankle decides to just give out and I fall like a pancake on my face. BUT I break my fall with my hand and arm. It was a gravelly place and dirt and debris got into my hand and it hurt. It took a minute to get up and I was a bit shaken up. What made me feel MUCH better was 4 Westport women who weighed 100 lbs collectively asking if I was ok a million times because when I fell I didn’t pop up like a spring chicken (which, for the record, Im certainly not).
So I ignored the hand, as usual. But by Sunday night it wasn’t feeling any better. Perhaps worse. So I decide to go to orthopedist yesterday and I may have broken a bone in my hand. Of course I did. They took X-Rays and they think its the hamate bone, which has a hook.
They think I broke off the hook part. When that happens, the piece of bone just floats around so they have to surgically remove the piece and eventually it will heal. Im going for an MRI to make sure its the correct diagnosis. Meanwhile, Im one handed. Honestly Im ready for 2020, like everyone else, to be over.
On a good note, my new dining room wallpaper is going up today. Im very excited because the house looks like a hoarder lives here with everything piled up all over the place. Everywhere I turn, its a mess. Also, the painters are coming tomorrow for bedroom so hopefully everything will be in order by next week. Fingers crossed. Will update when I get the MRI with results…OY.
So everything humming along here…until today. My endocrinologist called. He took blood tests from me last week, and got the results in. I am now a Type 1 diabetic. We’ve already been down this road, and I guess my pancreas was working slightly, but now has given up the ghost.
There are two main types of diabetes: type 1 and type 2. Both types of diabetes are chronic diseases that affect the way your body regulates blood sugar, or glucose. Glucose is the fuel that feeds your body’s cells, but to enter your cells it needs a key. Insulin is that key. People with type 1 diabetes don’t produce insulin. You can think of it as not having a key. People with type 2 diabetes don’t respond to insulin as well as they should and later in the disease often don’t make enough insulin. You can think of it as having a broken key.
For the last several months I’ve been on insulin 4 times a day and keeping track of my blood sugar. Ive been able to manage it pretty well. At this last visit my doctor put me on another medication which you take once a week to even out my sugars, and a monitor that stays in my arm for 2 weeks at a shot so that I don’t have to stick my fingers 4 times a day.
So I guess I just keep doing what I’m doing, forever. I really don’t know what else could happen to me, but I better not tempt fate because the next thing you know Ill develop a goiter on my neck or something else disgusting.
Meanwhile, Gma is acting up and I haven’t spoken to her in a few days because she’s just too much. I helped her figure out a bill and she informed me that her friend asked her, after she told her she’s losing weight, who’s helping her get clothes, and she said “Nobody…Im all alone…” then ANOTHER friend asked “Are you eating your vegetables because Im going to my daughters for a sit down dinner and having squash and green beans.” This is all backlash because she didn’t come over for dinner Sunday because we saw a show instead. It doesn’t matter how much I do, its not enough. I’ve had it. Im at the end of the road and soon she’s going to realize it…
On a brighter note, Miles, who has been spending time in New Orleans to be with Meg and some friends for a month, got through the hurricane ok and everyone is safe. Plus Sam and Phillip finished the deck at the top of the stairs and it looks fantastic. I have guys here stripping wallpaper and painting so our dining room and bedroom will have a lift, which Im sure we’ll enjoy during the upcoming colder months. Im looking forward to having a fresh look.
Sorry for all the ranting but I have to get it out…Am spending the rest of the day watching my favorite October movies, like Village of the Damned and trying to get my mind calmed down.
Ive taken the LAST trial pill! Very exciting because that means the main part of treatment is complete. I’ll still be on Letrozole for years, but as far as we can tell, the cancer has been conquered. I asked the Dr how will we know if its completely gone, and his response was, we cant REALLY know. However, we’ve done everything possible, and more, to eradicate it. Im grateful that I was approved for the trial and I can go on from here.
I had a little celebration because an old friend was in town and it was an excuse to get our group together. We’ve known each other around 20 years and have watched each others children grow up. I think that because of Corona its so rare to get together now that when we do its really fun and special. We got carried away with the wine, as usual, but it was great hearing stories about the kids and sharing what’s been happening. I know I sound mushy, but without my friends I could never have gotten through until now.
Meanwhile, back at the GMA front, she needs a new sink and faucet and you would think she’s renovating a $6 mil. mansion. I pick out a sink and faucet and of course its not correct. Now she’s called in a plumber and he says it needs changed (which is fine) but she just goes on and on, till the break of dawn. Today she’s coming over to pick something, so Im having a lovely cannibus pill before arrival. Also, she having trouble with the circulation in her feet, which two doctors told her was because of age, but she refuses to believe it. So Friday, it back to the DR to torture her more.
Work has slowed down so Im focusing on getting plantings in and the dining room done. All exciting stuff. Plus my beloved New Orleans Saints won their first game of the season last night so everything going pretty good!
It’s been a while so I thought I’d check in. A lot has been going on and I’m about to catch you up. Last month I was doing work for my friend Susan who owns an interior design firm with her partner Mila. I met Susan about 25 years ago when she was the creative director at Wamsutta and I worked for her as the graphic design manager. We had a great working relationship which changed to a wonderful, lifelong friendship which Im so grateful for.
She was lucky enough to get a few large jobs, due to Corona, which are based in CT and Westchester and needed a bit of help which I was thrilled to do. Mainly I got to order millions of things, which I could do from home and it was the perfect fit. She got me inspired and Im going to update a couple of rooms in the house. The boys, of course are resistant because they like everything to stay the same. But, considering we decorated 20 years ago, we need some new looks. Ill post when complete.
Last week, we went on vacation to Bar Harbor, Maine. We had a great time and it was fun just hanging out, the 4 of us, exploring new places. We were at the Acadia National Park and the boys did a lot of hiking, including hikes that involved rebar in the mountain to hold on to (which clearly I skipped). I relaxed, read some books, one day we went antiquing. The area is beautiful and is definitely something to see. Everyone was careful about distancing, masks etc so we felt pretty safe.
It was a great time away and I feel blessed that we were able to do it. Soon Miles will start his job and the window will close for family trips being easy to coordinate. I know Covid is horrible, but the good that has come out of it is that I’ve really enjoyed having the boys home and being together. We may get on each others nerves sometimes, but it’s good to reconnect as a family. Our vacation made it clear we still enjoy being together and having adventures which I hope will never change.
Now we are back to the grindstone, but so happy to have new memories.
Saturday was GMAs 87th birthday. She was good and we went to a harbor restaurant and she enjoyed herself. It was a nice time but she’s been slipping lately. She can’t remember anything – yet she refuses to believe she cant remember anything. She’s driving me insane. Last Friday she had on her calendar that she had a dr appt today. I asked her about it because I didn’t have it on my phone. She said “Well, its been there forever!” indignantly. Yesterday I called the dr to check on the time of appointment, and they said Oh, she cancelled it. THEN, I call her and asked when she was planning to tell me about the cancellation and she got all pissy because Im confronting her…oy.
Ive gotten her helper to come twice a week, but she maintains that she doesn’t need it. She complains about all her “paperwork” but when I offer to pay all the bills, she flips and says “NO I can do it.” So really, I cant win. This morning I got 12 (literally) calls before 10am. Her car battery died and she called AAA, which was fine but then there was a whole ordeal of her wanting to go to the dealer to ask questions, check the car, talk to the people etc. Finally convinced her to let the tow people take the car and the dealership will let her know what’s wrong. But everything is an elaborated ordeal, not to be easily remedied.
Meanwhile, there’s a chipmunk living beneath our garage and my dear husband read that they don’t like mothballs so now the garage smells like Great Aunt Gertrudes old coat. There is not enough liquor in the world for all of this…